Always a little girl

Always a little girl

Updated 06:43am (Mla time) Dec 19, 2004
By Rina Jimenez-David
Inquirer News Service



Editor's Note: Published on page A15 of the December 19, 2004 issue of the Philippine Daily Inquirer


WHEN my husband woke me up to tell me about the fire in the home of Speaker Joe and Gina de Venecia, and how their daughter KC had died as a result, the first thing I said was: "What?! The little girl?"

My children wondered whom I was talking about. "Mom," they said, "she was 16!" Yes, KC was indeed a young lady when she perished in the fire, but in my mind she was always the little girl whom Manay Gina would summon, together with her older brother Christopher, to be introduced to guests. The Christmas cards the De Venecias would send out each year would chronicle the amazing consequences of time's passing in their family, and most families. While Joe and Gina seemed hardly to age, Christopher and KC quickly, too quickly, left their childhood behind. Perhaps it's every parent's defense mechanism: to keep children forever children in our minds and imaginations, even as we behold the undisputed proof of their maturity.

I won't pretend to have known KC well, for all the time we shared were fleeting encounters in their Dasmariñas Village home and one memorable road trip to Dagupan to celebrate the election of President Fidel Ramos, our kabaleyan. But, dropping by KC's wake at Santuario de San Antonio, I saw a wealth of evidence of the kind of young woman she had been. Friends from the International School and Colegio San Agustin put together photo collages and bright-colored posters on KC: her favorite things, her favorite sayings, the good times she shared with her many friends.

The marble urn containing her ashes nestled in a bower of roses and other blooms, surrounded by framed photos of KC and of her family. It was amazing how, in just a few hours and in what must have been a state of deepest grief and bewilderment, the young woman's family and friends managed to put together a tribute to KC that was both tasteful and calming. Even strangers, who hardly knew the De Venecias apart from Joe and Gina's very public personas, felt for them keenly. There are no words to describe the pain of losing one's child, it is simply beyond imagining.


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BUT those who know the Speaker and his wife and their children, along with their extended family, can gauge the depths of their sorrows. Along with her brother Christopher, KC is the fruit of a second chance at love and marriage of two people who, at their age at the time of their meeting, may have thought they had already put such matters behind them.

Both recovering from failed marriages, they met, as Gina tells it, in a restaurant while she was having lunch with a good friend whom JDV also knew. Brazenly, Speaker Joe had himself introduced to Gina, then invited himself to join them for lunch and the movie afterwards, although, as Gina recounted in a magazine article, Joe slept through the film!

Together, they built a blended family that included not just Christopher and KC and the children from their respective previous marriages, but also their clans and their associates. In JDV's and Gina's case, "associates" covers a wide universe, indeed. For if as a couple they enjoyed a singular gift, it was the gift of friendship and hospitality, opening the doors of their Dasmariñas home to all comers. These could number in the hundreds and thousands when JDV's political sun is at its zenith, then dwindle to a small corps of friends and supporters when he suffers a downturn.

But if they ever felt the sting of disloyalty and betrayal, or were ever crestfallen at the downturns of Joe's political fortunes, they showed no signs of it. Joe is a consummate politician and his resilience is easy to explain. But how to explain Manay Gina's skills at this most difficult of callings, standing by her husband's side while carving out her own public space?


* * *

PART of the explanation lies in her upbringing, in the belly of the show-biz beast, as one of the daughters of "Doc" Perez and Mama Nena Vera Perez of Sampaguita Pictures, the pre-eminent star builder and major film studio that had its heyday in the 1950s up to the 1970s. It was no big thing for her, Gina once recalled, to wake up and find Gloria Romero or Susan Roces asleep beside her, since her father would rather put up his female stars in his home than risk their safety when they had to go home late at night.

"This is nothing to me," she remarked, when I observed how difficult it must be to be married to a politician and find your home filled with strangers so early in the morning. "In our home, we got used to dealing with actors, crew members and fans all hours of the day."

Ever the producer's daughter, Manay Gina also has a "nose" for public fortunes, be it in politics or show business. Her predictions about the future of personages attempting public careers often prove uncannily accurate, though sadly not accurate enough when it came to her own husband's presidential ambitions.

But it is not all politics with Gina. Asked why she chose to so publicly and wholeheartedly embrace the cause of Melissa Mercado Martel, who is suing her husband Robbie for attempted parricide, she said simply: "Because I have known Melissa since she was a baby, and because no woman deserves to be battered by her husband."


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TO GINA and Joe, there are simply no words we can offer to ease your pain or heal your hurt. All that those who care for you can do at this point is to pray that God grant you the grace of reconciliation and acceptance, at a time when you will need it most.

Right now, you are surrounded by a multitude of mourners, stunned by the sudden turn of fate and wishing comfort as much for themselves as for you. But the time will come when you must confront the reality of KC's absence from your lives in silence and in private. Our prayers fly to you for strength at that moment.